If you’re from here or you live here, these next few paragraphs will have you:
a) nodding your head in agreement
b) laughing at all the inside jokes
c) thinking of other so-Floridaisms
For example …
“To top Butterbeer, that would be big,” so says the chef who created Universal’s magical brew
Kennedy Space Center and Cape Canaveral, two locations that are synonymous with space travel, fall under your jurisdiction.
You have some of the most beautiful beaches ever seen by man … and other beaches where the water is so murky you can’t even see your feet.
Your hurricane seasons are legendary for causing stress, but — admit it — this is kind of where you want to be when spring break hits.
If you’re from here, you know these are signs you live in Florida.
You (think you) can outrun a gator
• It’s standard operating procedure to check under your car for an alligator. It’s also SOP to check your pool.
• You’ve seen a gator. Up close. Or on your lawn. Or in a canal. Or crossing the road. Or on a golf course. You shrug it off because “it’s normal.”
Alligators are pretty synonymous with Florida. So, too, are weird animal occurrences.
• You’ve been scared by a snake in the grass.
Albino animals: Photos of white alligators, deer, kangaroo, skunks and a wallaby
You’ve heard of Florida Man
Is it the water? Although nicknamed the Sunshine State, Florida is home to truly bizarre cases that get a lot of reaction on social media — these are known as Florida Man.
In 2019, this story went viral: Florida man thought he was stealing opioids but instead got laxatives, police say.
In 2021, a Florida man annoyed by potholes in the street planted a banana tree in said pothole.
If you live in Florida, embrace the weirdness:
• You’ve heard of Skunk Ape.
• You’ve listened to a police scanner and heard (more than once), “Suspect is naked.”
Um, okay, I’ll bite … This is why everyone is Googling ‘Florida man’ and their birthday
Hmm. Why do so many crazy crimes happen in Florida?
There’s ALWAYS a Florida tie
• You know someone on a reality TV show.
• Everybody knows someone who graduated from the University of Florida.
• You know Florida is home to a lot of celebrities. Like Carrot Top.
We’re so beach life, #FloridaLife and island time
• You’ve heard of surfer etiquette.
• You know which beaches are tourist-friendly, surfer-friendly, not surfer-friendly, and empty if you want to be by yourself.
• When a tropical storm hits, people evacuate. Surfers go to the beach.
Signs you live on the Treasure Coast of Florida: You’ve search for buried treasure … at the beach … “for fun”
• It’s OK to wear flip-flops to fancy restaurants.
• You have at least three pairs of sunglasses.
• You know how to tan and not get burnt like a tourist.
• You recognize that smell of coconut sunscreen.
What are the BEST beaches in Florida? Here are 10 of our faves across the Sunshine State
Signs you live in Melbourne, Florida: Sonic booms, Kate Upton and rockets that have a “jellyfish effect”
Wegmans? Kroger? Nah. Floridians love Publix
• When the lottery jackpot gets big, the lines at Publix get long.
• If you win the lotto, you probably bought your ticket from Publix.
Who won the Top 10 largest lottery jackpot prizes ever? List of Powerball, Mega Millions winners
You’ve tried astronaut ice cream
• You’ve eaten a Publix sub.
• You’ve tried gator tail at least once.
• You’ve tried Dole Whip or Butterbeer.
• You’ve tried Key lime pie.
Charming!:Cinderella Castle at Magic Kingdom has certainly changed over the years
People assume you live close to Disney
• When someone asks what part of Florida you’re from, you follow up with, “we’re (X hours far) from Orlando. Miami. Tampa.”
• Your school field trips involved a theme park.
• You know when to go to Disney and when not to go to Disney.
• Going to a theme park? Forget the cute heels and wear comfy shoes.
• Socks and sandals are acceptable.
You’ve complained about the weather. But you also love Florida weather
• You have an umbrella, but it’s always in the car when you really need it.
• It’s sunny. Then it rains. Then it’s sunny. Then it rains. All in a span of 10 minutes.
• The four seasons here are hot, hot, nice and sweltering.
• Or, the four seasons are: tourist season, rainy season, hurricane season and football season.
• You get excited at the prospect of clouds and rain on a super hot day.
• You have an office sweater or office gloves (fingerless so you can still type).
• Lovebug season is the worst. And it lasts two to three weeks.
• If we get snow or hail, it’s news — on CNN and TikTok.
• When you hear “frozen iguanas,” it’s cold in Florida.
‘It’s real.’ Frozen iguanas in Florida: Best photos, tweets, Instagram posts about cold weather event
• There’s a festival just about every weekend from January to November. Mullet Festival or Weird Beard Festival, anyone?
• The lines at the car wash during lovebug season are long.
• If Jim Cantore comes here, it’s cool … but not really.
Weather Channel star Jim Cantore in Florida through the years — for hurricanes, non-weather events
Colleagues chimed in, too
My USA TODAY Network-Florida colleagues offer their signs you live in Florida:
• “When your primary garment combination is shorts and a T-shirt,” Rick Christie, executive editor of the Palm Beach Post
• “And your long-sleeve shirts and long pants last 20 years,” Gerard Walen, digital planner
• “Paint shops offer seagull white to counter the stains,” Tony Bolick, digital sports planner
• “A Pub sub tattoo is normal,” Hannah Leyva, digital producer with the Florida Digital Optimization Team
• “When both pavement and sand are capable of first-degree burns, your solution is to walk a little faster,” C.A. Bridges, a Florida digital producer
• “Parking near a store isn’t anywhere near as important as parking in the shade — no matter how far away it is,” C.A. Bridges
• “Putting your pool in a cage is normal,” Ginny Beagan, a Florida digital producer
• “When you have at least 2 pairs of flip flops and refer to one as ‘formal,'” Jonathan Tully, lead producer
• “When you have permanent flip-flop tan lines on your feet,” Myung Syin, digital planner
• “You’ve witnessed at least one golf cart road rage incident,” Katlyn Sartoris, digital planner
• “When you don’t bother evacuating for a Category 1 hurricane,” Dan Rorabaugh, a Florida digital producer
• “or a Category 2 or Category 3 hurricane,” Ray Glenn, Panama City News Herald content coach and engagement editor
• “You probably even go outside during a hurricane, saying, ‘It’s just a little wind,'”
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